Beta Reading Jeryn's Dagger by D.L. Young

​In September of 2021, I had the pleasure of being a beta reader for D.L. Young’s science fiction novel Jeryn’s Dagger, the first book in a new epic space opera trilogy, Empire and Ashes.
 
Jeryn’s Dagger is the tale of a roguish computer/knife fighting expert pulled into galactic-scale skullduggery as political machinations threaten to destabilize a 10,000-world empire.
 
Sound cool? That’s because it is.

​I’d like to give you look behind the curtain of this beta reading process and offer some advice to potential and current beta readers.
 
First, for those of you wondering, “What is beta reading?” the rundown is as such: After first-round editing but before the finalization of a book, an author asks a group to read the manuscript and give feedback. A quick description for a long process.
 
This group usually consists of between 5-15 people. More is sometimes merrier, but there are diminishing returns; we all know the adage about too many cooks spoiling the soup.
 
(How many cooks does it take to make a soup? Only one, if they’re big enough. Muhahaha…)
 
Having a variety of people in the mix is also better: die hard genre fans, casual readers, and other authors all representing a mix of genders, ethnicities, and backgrounds can help provide alternative perspectives, though the author is always keeping in mind their target audience. Some authors even seek out “sensitivity readers” if their books touch upon, you guessed it, sensitive subjects, for example LGBTQ+ issues.
 
Beta reading carries with it a certain amount of responsibility, with deadlines and content requirements. Because of this, authors often offer incentives like a mention in the acknowledgments, signed copies of the finished product, and high fives. Those are all awesome, but, as an author myself, I get other things out of it.
 
Being part of someone else’s creative process and connecting with other authors is a fun and rewarding experience. Also, beta reading teaches me to be a better writer since it’s often easier to see problems in other people’s work than in your own, which can then alert you to trouble areas in your writing. Basically, it’s one way to circumnavigate familiarity-blindness.
 
This does bring up a side issue in beta reading: professional bias. Readers tend to read differently than authors; they are seeking entertainment, emotion, escape, and something to do during their lunch break so they don’t have to talk to Brad from accounting. Can’t you see, Brad, that I’m reading, and don’t want to hear the saga of your mole removal?
 
Right, anyway, that’s readers. Authors can be pickier than the average reader, tripping up on inconsistencies, plot holes, on-the-nose dialog, I-could-do-it-better-itis, and other things that might be completely ignored by readers just looking for a good time. So if you’re an author about to beta read, pull your reader hat over your writer hat (cuz we all know that writer hat ain’t goin’ nowhere).
 
Jeryn’s Dagger was not the first book I’ve beta read for, but it was a project I really enjoyed sinking my teeth into, and my interaction with D.L. Young (David) were equally enjoyable, so this whirlwind of enjoyment inspired me to share.
 
When I got feedback on my feedback, I was over the moon:

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“Thanks again for the amazing feedback. I’m going through the details again and I’m amazed at how many great points you made. I seriously believe you could freelance as a developmental editor.”
​-D.L. Young 

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After reading this multiple times, and briefly considering getting a plaque made, I instead decided to pass along my method for providing useful feedback. (To be honest, it only became a “method” in retrospect, when I went back and analyzed what I’d done.)
 
When I beta read, I do it with two sets of eyes and a notepad app. The first set I refer to as (of just now) Hot Looks and the second Wide Eyes.
 
Note: Jeryn's Dagger is a great read. Epic in scope but personal in nature, there's action, a lovable crew, unexpected twists, all contained in a fun universe. The examples of “problems” taken from the book are purely my own opinions, reading with a critical eye, and those that D.L. Young agreed with will have been dealt with in the final version. This is what beta reading is all about: fixing things before they reach the public.

​The examples are included for teaching purposes only, and have been vague-ified to avoid spoilers.

Hot Looks

​Hot Looks, which I organize by chapter, are my first impressions. They often cover:

• Behavior Believability: Do character actions make sense, given who and where they are?

Example:  I felt a character was keeping secrets without a clear internal motivation and was doing so only to surprise the reader later.

• Consistency: Do environments and people retain internal consistency? Are there any instances of stuff-switching (yellow-flecked obsidian eyes to lilac irises on stalks, that kind of thing.) 

Example: The special properties of a device seemed to work differently at different times without explanation.

• Word/Punctuation Usage: Overuse of words and phrases. Everyone has their go-to vocabulary which can infiltrate a manuscript.

Example: The word “workaday” and an abundance of parentheses.

• Other "Huh?" Moments: Anytime I feel myself do a mental head scratch, even if it’s brief, I note what caused it.

 
With Hot Looks comments, I worry less about my own grammar/structure, especially on the first pass. Another thing to keep in mind is that Hot Looks can turn out to be inaccurate or a jumped gun. In many cases while reading Jeryn’s Dagger, I thought I'd run into a questionable moment only to have the issue cleared up a few paragraphs or chapters later. That’s okay, don’t delete them from your feedback; they’re still valuable for analyzing the pacing at which information is divulged, as in: are readers left in the dark for too long?

Wide Eyes

​This is the big picture: character and plot arcs, world building, pay-offs, and the like. To help in my own organization, I summarize in broad, chapter-spanning strokes what happens (e.g. Jeryn & crew travel to Planet X, pick up doohickey.) Problems with with this stuff can leave readers feeling dissatisfied but not sure why.
 
Examples:

• A character’s frequent whoopsies didn’t seem to fit with their position. Everyone makes mistakes, of course, but when their mistakes are often used to move the plot forward, it can be an issue.
• A character didn’t feel like they had enough agency. They spent a lot of time watching other people do cool stuff and pondering what what was going on.
• There seemed to be an abundance of instances where we were told how something in the universe worked, then shown right after, or vice versa.

 
Once I’ve cut down both the trees and the forest, I then take out my cerebral saw, hammer, and nails, and try to build solutions to the problems I find. These are only suggestions, to be used or not by the author.

Feedback Format

Overview
A brief summary of my overall impressions of the book.
 
Characters

• What worked
• What didn’t
• Solutions

 
World/Universe

• What worked
• What didn’t
• Solutions

 
Chapter 1

• Hot Looks

Chapter 2

• Hot Looks

​And so on.

Final Thoughts 

On the difficulty of accepting feedback​:
Good authors like D.L. Young understand that feedback is an essential part of the creation process. When you spend months or years creating your baby, it can be tough to avoid become defensive, throwing out excuses or accusations when that baby is criticized. But that’s not how you get better.
 
Not all feedback is accurate, applicable, or coherent, but someone took their time to produce it, and that shouldn’t be scoffed at. So even if you don’t use it, it is good to be courteous when you receive feedback. Also, don’t be afraid to ask follow-up questions, but don’t expect the reader to fix the issues for you.

On giving feedback:
On the flip side, as a beta reader, present your criticisms in a constructive way. Simply saying, “this sucks” doesn’t give the author any indication of what changes need to be made. Even if your reasons are hard for you to pin down, describe those impressions as best you can, they will be very much appreciated.
 
Some phrases that might help if you’re having trouble giving even general reasons why you didn’t like an aspect of a book:

• “I get the feeling that something is missing.”
• “There doesn’t seem to be much going on or much accomplished.”
• “I’m not getting a sense of who the character is. I can’t even guess at what they might like to do in their free time.”
• “The ending felt rushed; I didn’t feel like the events were set up enough.”

I hope this was informative, and can help you as you set out to get beta readers, or beta read yourself.

For more information about D.L. Young, head to his website here.